I was Assaulted a Couple of Times at SUNY Maritime And Harassed Afterwards. Women Should Not Have to Battle Sexual Harassment & Assault Throughout Their Training and Careers.

* This account was submitted to MLAA by the victim who wishes to remain anonymous *

I was assaulted a couple of times when I was at maritime. Two different times, someone I trusted and thought of as a friend took advantage of me. At first, it seemed so gray to me and I made excuses for them. I was too nice, too caught up in wanting to be a good friend. I brushed it off and honestly still haven't come to terms with it. I downplay it a lot because a part of me refuses to acknowledge what happened.

In my senior year, I started to realize the way I was being treated by my "friends" and peers was not okay. When I graduated I worked on the training ship. I was excited to work with the mates as I knew most of them already, they were my teachers and had always been great to me. Immediately after I got on, one of the mates that had been so great to me during my senior cruise began harassing me. I guess I was "fair game" now that I wasn't a student.

He would try to tear my self confidence down and manipulate me and try to convince me to hang out with him. He made bets on me and so many other comments that made me extremely uncomfortable and I constantly worried he was speaking crudely about me to my coworkers. I was so disappointed I guess because I had expected such a professional environment because I was now a licensed officer on the training ship. Especially because I wasn't getting much respect from the other side.

I was teaching and the students definitely took some leeway with me being young and a girl. Most just made comments about how I looked and tried to give me their numbers and I laughed that off. But one kid went so far as to grab my ass in port when he saw me out. I had no idea what to do about it and just pretended it didn't happen because I knew there was already a stigma around hiring recent grads because of the school's concern with frat.

I got a job in the industry recently and there he was. Another man (SUNY grad of course) making inappropriate comments to me. He actually waited until we weren't working together to start saying things that made me uncomfortable. I'd only ever known him in a professional capacity for a very short amount of time. Someone I thought would become a great contact in the industry quickly became someone I hope I never get on a ship with.

I know my story is fairly mild compared to many others but I have had a lot of trouble realizing that what was happening to me was not okay. Any form of harassment is NOT okay and I've been so trained by society to make excuses for it. Now, I constantly worry that I'm being talked about sexually and that someone will start harassing me. I love working in the maritime industry but every girl who does should not have to battle sexual assault and harassment throughout their training and career.